Stop! and you will become aware

Normal service is resumed after my mid-week edition. This is visit 4 to Chez Den. A little bit of a mixed bag this week but this is what is toasting Den's buns this arctic Saturday.

This one gives makes Den think of The Walker Brothers and that ain’t a bad thing, baby…This may have been recorded by Little Anthony & The Imperials but I ain’t sure…it’s the only lacquer cracker I’ve got on a fantastic pea-green NEMS label and the only record i've heard by Cupid's Inspiration. It’s top drawer pop that floats Den’s boat right up the River Don...they don't make 'em like this anymore

Cupid's Inspiration- Yesterday has gone

Den can be remember being knee-high to a grasshopper and tuning in to watch Granada TV’s flop soap “Albion Market” and Den Snr telling him that one of the stall holders was Helen Shapiro, ex- pop star. Zip forward 10 years and Den’s eyes are opened to this one, though he’s told by one of his dealers that he’d have to sell his Grandma to get his biscuit snatchers on a copy. The elusive search for this perfect slab of teen blue eyed soul continues…but that’s what gets Den out of his pit in the am….

This one is on the flip of The Miracles cover “Shop around” but also features on the CD British Soul Vol 2…but I couldn’t resist showing you the cover of the album “Helen hit’s out” it's where it's at, kittens…

Helen Shapiro- He knows how to love me

“So sticky, and gooey, and salty”…Buttered Popcorn as sung by Florence Ballard, the real lead singer of The Supremes before that wafer-thin voiced, twiglet Diane Ross started doing the shimmy shake with Berry Gordy (yup, the Diana moniker was to sound ‘classy’!)…Florence sings that her other half is more interested in eating buttered popcorn than her…jeez, what a hammer head! Anyway, kick back and think what could have been…

The Supremes- Buttered Popcorn

“I feel like something incredible is going to happen here….” Yup, Scorsese’s best, most enjoyable film gets Den’s juices flowing…I hadn’t watched this for a while but digging Patricia led me back to her older Sis Rosanna and her great turn in this flick that’s near perfect. You’d certainly chase half way across Soho in the rain to get your hands on a bagel and cream cheese paperweight wouldn’t you? It’s got a great soundtrack but I’ve yet to find a copy…maybe you can…watch the trailer and some deleted scenes…Griffin Dunne’s the berries!

After Hours Trailer

After Hours Out-takes

Now Den has laid his peepers on this one, it was back in July at Volupte and he’s got the Diva Dollars to prove it! (yes that is one of the ubiqutous Den Iniquity chip shovels in shot) The fan dance with the fairy lights almost made me choke on finger sandwich…fantastic stuff! And I'll give Diva Hollywood the highest complement a Den can give to a dame...She's got a great face!

Diva Hollywood- Starlight

Diva seems to have a lack of vids out there so you'll have to take Den's words for the images scorched on his retinas that she really is the monkey's waistcoat!

Hump day

For my first mid-week visit to the den I’ve gone girl crazy…so Den being Den he’s on first name terms with these ladies…Noreen, Mary, Chelsea, Jeanette, Barbara, Patricia & Marianne. Kick back with these extras to feed your Ipod and please yo peepers...more news at the weekend.

This one made the steam come out the top of my head the first time I heard it…phew! What do I know about her…absolutely zip but when you’ve got a load of bopdebopdebops, a xylophone buried under a wall of sound, a name like Noreen and an invitation to run your fingers through her fur what can you say other than; Ms Cococoran you could out-whistle Whistler’s Mother…

Noreen Cocoran- Love Kitten

I really thought this LP may be a pile of old rope…I knew “Baby that’s me” but this knocks the spots off that one. The LP is great…even the covers of the 60s pop & R ‘n’ B standards stand up pretty well. I’m a little confused as to what the other slices of The Cake are up to for the majority of this track as it sounds like a solo performance right up to the last twenty seconds…Anyway, this will pull you dead to the curb. Wang it on and settle down with a cup of Den’s current favourite pick up after a night on the giggle juice…a nice steaming cup of Twinings 1706 strong blend…it gets Den through his lousy day gig…

The Cake- World of dreams

Again, the indecisive reluctant side of Den poo-pahed this one when he first heard that Mary Weiss had recorded an album…but through Shangri-la submersion therapy in Spring 2008 he realized that this was the next stage in his girl group rehab…Well I laid out my cash for this and have been giving it heavy spins ever since…Den is hot for buying more booty from the great Norton Records when his chump change arrives from his 9-5. Anyway, what more can I say, it’s got guts and it don’t make you slobber…dig it people!

Mary Weiss- Don't come back

Den’s been kicking back and watching more David Lynch eye-ball pleasers on the one-eyed lodger; last night he settled down for “Lost Highway”. Patricia Arquette as a fierce, moody, intense, brunette with the sharpest fringe this side of Betty P alongside a second helping of Patricia as an ice cream haired, promiscuous, devious, porn star, gangsters moll…if only they were two people (Lynch says it’s the same person!) Den could dream up mathematical possibilities that would make a rocket scientists head hurt! So, then the age old question…blonde vs brunette…which one is the cat’s whiskers?

Patricia Arquette- Lost Highway blonde

Patricia Arquette- Lost Highway brunette

So Den is lost for words now he’s at the end of his extra edition…Den discovered Marianne Cheesecake during his scouting work, he aint seen her up close yet but being a master baker (banana bread for the inner circle this week!) like Marianne in this bizarre juice/ baking routine he can empathize with her artistic goals. Although he could have done without the audience member goofing around at the end, Cheesecake is still a frickin’ hoot- she shakes it, she fan’s it, she laughs at herself, she dresses like a geezer; She's got what it takes- she don't take herself too seriously, what more could you ask for

Marianne Cheesecake- Baking time!

Marianne Cheesecake- Fan dance

Den Vegas

So you join Den for another installment in blogsville. Den is feeling lonesome as his squeeze is OS, so he may wander back into this dark corner of the web before next weekend...anyway, Den has some rat pack, a bathing belle & a drag king for your delight this week...

Have you ever met anyone who dislikes Dino? Most of them would struggle to name one of his songs other than the ubiquitous Italian restaurant staple “That’s amore” so it’s down to Den to educate Joe Q. Public. This is from an LP called “The Dean sings” that Den reeled in from a car boot sale back in ’98. This a bright, summery tune that flies by and is perfect to banish the reality of a cold, dark, dank, stinking Sheffield January…And yes, that is a thumbs up from Den!

Dean Martin- In the cool, cool of the evening

I once heard Frankie say that you should never hitch your cart to a fad or a novelty as you’ll end up looking like a schlub. Well he must have had a very big plate to eat his words from when the 47 year old, rug wearing Francis Albert cut this side back in ’62. Ol’ Blue Eyes was hitchin’ his wagon aboard the twist craze and he pulls it off with some aplomb! Who gives a monkeys if Frank is a skinny ass desperado…this is the cats ‘jamas!

PS- I couldn't keep this one under my hat...Ava Gardener upon being asked "What are you doing with a 120 pound loser like Sinatra?"..."Well" she said, "20 pounds of that is cock"!

Frank Sinatra- Ev'rybody's twistin'

And so to Sammy…the vertically challenged one eyed, black, Jew who is constantly being saddled with cheap clichés and stereotypes that mean that tunes like this get buried on the b-side of something called “The second best secret agent in the world”. It’s hard to describe this…is it a late night Vegas, finger-clicking lounge number, a northern soul beat ballad…I dunno? Who cares this is one real gone lacquer cracker that makes me want to buy more and more Sammy…He can sing, dance and like Joe Q I find him hilarious as the priest alongside Dino in “The Cannonball Run”.

Sammy Davis Jnr- If you want this love of mine

A load of toffs living the high life and committing much incestuous whoopee in 1940’s wartime London…The Camomile Lawn has a great cast including Jennifer Ehle, Tara Fitzgerald, Toby Stephens, Felicity Kendall and a very young Rebecca Hall I’ve been watching this on 4 on demand and it’s great during the period set scenes but falls a little flat in the final episode…Calypso is an absolute harlot but makes Den feel all unnecessary!

Calypso makes like a fish

Den is going straight to hell with this one…Even though he’s yet to see her in the flesh this vid made his eyes fall out of his head like a pair of cheap joke shop eyes on springs glasses. There’s something about a women in man’s clothes wearing a fake moustache that gives Den the screaming mimi’s…check it out for the pay off at the end!

Red Sarah- The Tweed Lover

Bomb in the den!

Hello and welcome to Den's first broadcast. Den's got three tracks about the fairer sex, a great Twin Peaks Promo and the hootchie-kootchie queen Bernie Dexter...keep tuned in for regular posts and updates from Den's Den.

A bad attitude rock n roll tune featured on the LP “Nasty Rockabilly” Vol.5 which features a cover far too rude even for Den! This stormer features the unforgettable line…“If I had me a woman who was big and fat, I’d look her up and down like an alley cat”. This douche-bag later howls “If I had me a woman who was tall and thin, I wouldn’t care what state she was in”, the oddly named Blacky Vale or Mr. McVale to you clearly ain’t picky who he rolls in the hay with and for two minutes one second he don’t give a monkey’s who knows!

Blacky Vale- If I had me a woman

Meanwhile whilst Billy J. Kramer escapes the clutches of Brian Epstein’s amore by the latter’s buying the farm in June ’67 he cuts this great ode to “the greatest Oriental”. This one is buried on the b-side of the God-awful, stinking Bee Gees penned track “Town of Tuxley toymaker” (you know it’s gonna be some terrible “Cups and cakes” British ‘psychedelia’ with a title like that!). This is by far BJK’s best slice of vinyl and one of the best late 60’s Mersey-beat survivor records...I don’t have this German picture sleeve but I thought I’d paste it in due to Billy’s terrible barnet! My UK copy is on the right….

Billy J. Kramer & The Dakotas- Chinese Girl

I know absolutely zip about this one other than they are from the South Coast. A fantastic harmonica lead track that makes The Stones sound like a bunch of lily-livered sissies! It starts like “Some other guy” and is all over in less than 2 minutes. Not surprising when the sneering sleaze of a singer tells the women in question “that all you’ve got is a pretty face”. If that’s the case then just under 2 minutes of my time sounds about right…

The Beat Merchants- Pretty Face

And now some hootchin' & kootchin' from downtown San Diego...Despite the fact that Bernie floats Den’s boat, avert your eyes and tune in your cab doors…This is “Once More” by Bill Forbes…I have searched the highways and byways of this land for this mythical beast…I would sell one of my kidneys to get my hands on this and the other to get my hands on Bernie! Ho-ho!

Bernie Dexter- Once More dance




And so to the end...Den's been settling in to watching Season 2 of "Twin Peaks" and it's been frying his wig...here's more laughs with Coop in a "Wizard of Oz" skit!


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